Hurt

I spoke about you today as I do in my mind

But when i spoke aloud I had to be precise

My words were tumbling out and my heart was choking up

I had to say ‘you were’ and that just really hurt

I looked for you in the sky, somewhere behind those clouds

I tried to complain about the pain that you are really not around

I stared at your picture, you lovely white hair like the clouds

How I longed to hold you close – just that alone really hurt

Those that lived with you

I wonder how they can stand it

Walking around the house looking around

Not ever finding you there – must really hurt

At least I can pretend that you are still there

But what will I do when I visit again?

As the realization will hit every time

The pain raw and the heart will always hurt

I can’t really come to terms

Everyday I say aloud, ‘ can you believe he is not here anymore?’

Everyday the silence stares at me

Causing my heart to hurt – every single day