Disconnecting

I remember as a teen when Abbu would be sitting with the newspaper on the kitchen table and asked me about world events. I couldn’t care less and he always looked disappointed that I didn’t want to know what was going on in the world. He would then give the newspaper to my younger sister and she’d read it and discuss what Russia was doing, what America was up to, Japan and so on. To me, it was too much extra news I could live without.

I never thought about it then and as I grew up I felt that I had been such a disappointment by not wanting to learn the things Abbu would like me to learn. Poetry in Urdu being one of them. But later on I realized that we are all meant to be doing different things in life and hence our personalities are created that way. I wish I could’ve been what he wanted but then I would have to wear a mask and pretend. So I learned to accept myself and do the best I could with what I am.

Fast forward to the world of social media where even if you don’t want to know what’s happening around you or around the world, you are bombarded with that information. Then your mind starts to get anxious, tense, confused because there is contradictory information constantly coming in. If you are a news junkie you crave to know what is happening yet it almost seems to put you in an abyss of darkness from which you cannot come out – unless you choose to disconnect.

Eventually when I couldn’t take the women in my town bashing each other over silly things and I couldn’t take the friend who was pretending that she is happily married when I knew the truth, the bashing of scholars and the conspiracy of governments – I disconnected. I was told that this was the worse thing I could do because how would friends and family stay connected with me? I didn’t have facebook anymore – I didn’t have Whatsapp and now I was not seeing the latest pictures, who married who, who died, who ate what and who was sick.

Hello? ever heard of the TELEPHONE? So what if it costs money? When it was $3.99 per minute to call overseas, people called, talked for just enough to give and get news of health and prosperity and then called a month later again. Now that it costs $0.08 a minute, they are getting cheap and waiting for the ‘free app’ to use? I hate to be a cynic but you see such things and can’t help becoming one.

Needless to say, when covid hit and people divided on : Mainstream vs. Opposition, vs. people who dont think and just do…the news started to pour in and the confusion, the mistrust, the cynical thoughts started to also erupt.

And this is what I learnt: The more we disconnect from all this and stick to what is relevant “today, in my community, around my house and what I can do” – that will ultimately be better for our psyche and our mental health and help us stay productive.

I love to learn. I love to read. But I just have to be very very selective and practical. If it doesn’t concern me, or I can’t do anything about it – just let it go.

So Abbu, I think my personality when I was earlier of not wanting to know about things that dont affect me is helping me now. I just need to stick to what I preach 😀